funny shit thread

[Dead Kid]

[Dubpunker]

[Drax]

[Dubpunker]

[Dubpunker]

[spazgrinder]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=paG1-lPtIXA

how do you embed youtube vids these days.

[PertHJ]

how do you embed youtube vids these days.

Just post the URL without any tags

[9seconds]

was a pretty good weekend in (north of) auckland anyway. At like 4am on saturday morning this dude was like 'I've gotta milk my cows, wanna come' and I was like 'yeah ok', so we go there, he pours us some strong vodkas, and get's us milking cows for about 3 hours.

But yeah - party times.

holy fuck, hahahaha

[Dubpunker]

[FC]

how do you embed youtube vids these days.

Just post the URL without any tags

I don't care how many add ons that story has, it might be the best story ever.

[Dead Kid]

[the croc]

[Dead Kid]

[Dead Kid]

NSFW: https://thegoresplatteredcorner.com/201 ... ucational/

The film comes in the format of fake documentary style, with an associated National Geographic narration, and at a meagre three quarters of an hour running time can be firmly split into three distinctive equal parts; people ambling around the countryside aimlessly, people having sex, Bigfoot having sex with said people’s girlfriends. I say Bigfoot but in the universe of The Geek that constitutes someone in brown trousers (you can clearly see the bottoms) brown shoes, an awful wig, 70’s pimp fur coat and a weird mask.

[TimShadbolt]

Almost definitely a repost but

[Dead Kid]

[Subcide]

[Kerry]

[bruce wayne]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NEnHfqXWkcU

he looks like he's having heroine withdrawl coming on in every video

fuck fuck fuck where's the smack i need a hit now now now

[Kerry]

[Kerry]

[Dead Kid]

[Dead Kid]

http://the-grievances.blogspot.co.nz/20 ... -grip.html

Glue falls into three categories...the harmless sloppy goo kids use to affix sparkles to their art work...and also find delicious....the slightly more serious glue stick, used by both children and adults....for much the same purpose...and the the adults only 'super glue'....a deadly chemical concoction that can be used, apparently, for anything, including being inhaled as an addictive, muscular and nervous system destroying substance.

Excluding this misuse, the average adult has recourse to use a super glue approximately once every three years...so it's off to the super market to purchase a tiny tube of arrestingly named Tarzan's Grip....featuring an illustration of the titular character forcing a lion's jaws open...presumably to put a couple of drops in there to then fuse them shut forever...which seems a tad severe...not to mention illegal...but does convincingly illustrate the power of what is inferred as his preferred brand of adhesive...why and how a wild man in the jungle has access to a super glue is not really explained.

But no matter, because this stuff is apparently so powerful that with three drops you could stick an elephant to a car, and then stick the car on the bottom of a battle ship...which you could then stick to the side of a Boeing 747...if that's what you wanted...it also has the magical property of being able to adhere any material upon the earth to any other...wood, plastic, metal, ceramic...if it exists...Tarzan's Grip will fuse it to something else...giving one a Dr Frankenstein-like dominion over inanimate objects...of unholy joining...like sticking a sewing machine to an accordion...or a radiator to a television set.

But the majority of users are not pray to this sort of megalomania...instead just wanting to fix that pesky broken lampshade...or that chipped bit of tile above the light switch... innocuous, non-vital tasks...quite a world away from needing to fuse a lion's jaws shut.

The nozzle is designed in such a way that the slightest squeeze will immediately release about fifteen times the amount of the liquid necessary...mostly on the fingers...on which it hardens instantly...leaving one to complete the rest of delicate operation as though wearing nail varnish finger gloves...which is sort of like trying to sew wearing a pair of mittens...thus ensuring that great dollops of the stuff go everywhere except to their intended destination...leaving all the surrounding surfaces all speckled and smeared like the scene of some ghastly sex crime...but you eventually 'get it in'...so to speak...and hold the injured surfaces together for a few seconds...and then watch as they just ping open again.

Frustrated, you leave the task at hand for a few days, and recuperate, with those weird varnished fingertips immune to any solvent...and then return to the tube...where you discover that the only thing Tarzan's Grip is truly capable of welding is the cap to the nozzle...and it has been estimated that fifteen percent of the earth's land fill is comprised solely of once-used, and useless, tubes of Tarzan's Grip.

I just wanted to copy and paste some highlights, but there's gold in every paragraph.

[Kerry]

EX BLACK SABBATH TOUR BUS! 1984 DAF 8.2 LITRE DIESEL 38 FOOT COACH.. MAY SWAP??
https://www.gumtree.com/p/other-cars/ex ... ialbuttons

Willing to swap for something Interesting Car Van or Caravan?? But please NO Vectra's / Mondeo's

[Dubpunker]

old but gold.

[Dubpunker]

[Dubpunker]

[No Way Out Records]

That was pretty awesome

[9seconds]

i saw this in reverse somewhere, was pretty sweet

[No Way Out Records]

yeah.. I think the original was the reverse one.. nut then again my Russian is non-existant.