free shit jokes and stuff

Have you got anything you don't want and want to give it to a good home for nothing? Here is the place!
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Dan Last
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Postby Dan Last » Tue Oct 30, 2007 2:49 pm

I totally lost it when he started doing that shit. What a crack-up/champion. Nothing wrong with sniffing glue if you end up like him.
I'm not a cool guy anymore.

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vibri
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Postby vibri » Tue Oct 30, 2007 7:28 pm

MORE
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rryan
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Postby rryan » Tue Oct 30, 2007 7:43 pm

whats the difference between the all blacks & a teabag?

the teabag stays in the cup longer


LOAL
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Dan Last
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Postby Dan Last » Tue Oct 30, 2007 10:39 pm

Epic Fail.
I'm not a cool guy anymore.

bulaperry
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crap jokes

Postby bulaperry » Fri Nov 02, 2007 8:22 am

Times New Roman walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve your type in here."


What's the difference between a Catholic priest and a pimple?

Pimples don't come over your face until your 13.


How many Vietnam veterans does it take to change a lightbulb?

(People normally say "dunno", so you say "guess"

How would you know, you weren't even there!

bulaperry
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more crap jokes

Postby bulaperry » Fri Nov 02, 2007 8:56 am

Q) What's the difference between a blonde and a washing machine?

A) The washing machine doesn't follow you around for 2 weeks after you've dumped your load.


Q) What do you do if you see a Tasmanian with half a head?

A) Reload.


Q) How do you circumsize a Tasmanian?

A) Kick his sister under the chin.


Q) How many guitarists does it take to play a leadbreak?

A) 14. 1 to play it and 13 to say how much better they could of done it.


Q) How many songwriters does it take to change a lightbulb?

A) None, they sit there with the lightbulb & wait for the world to revolve around them.

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Dead Kid
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Postby Dead Kid » Fri Nov 02, 2007 10:25 am

What do girls and KFC chicken have in common?

You start with the breast, then go to the thigh, and then you're left with a greasy box to stick your bone in.

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bridge.
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Re: more crap jokes

Postby bridge. » Fri Nov 02, 2007 10:42 am

bulaperry wrote:Q) How do you circumsize a Tasmanian?

A) Kick his sister under the chin.




:shocked!:

bulaperry
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totally tasteless

Postby bulaperry » Fri Nov 02, 2007 2:46 pm

0X
Last edited by bulaperry on Fri Jun 13, 2008 1:54 pm, edited 1 time in total.

ruff
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Postby ruff » Fri Nov 02, 2007 4:41 pm

A young black boy is given wings by God.

Am I an Angel now Lord?

Fuck no nigger, your a bat!

bulaperry
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nasty

Postby bulaperry » Fri Nov 02, 2007 5:48 pm

Q) Why do tampons have string?

A) So you can floss after you've eaten.

bulaperry
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Postby bulaperry » Fri Nov 02, 2007 6:11 pm

:drinking:
Last edited by bulaperry on Tue May 20, 2008 1:10 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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vibri
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Postby vibri » Fri Nov 02, 2007 10:15 pm

<--- THREADMASTER
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RHB
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Postby RHB » Sat Nov 03, 2007 10:19 am

wot's the weirdest smell in the world?


















an anchovy's cunt

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vibri
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Postby vibri » Sat Nov 03, 2007 10:45 am

lulz

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RHB
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Postby RHB » Sat Nov 03, 2007 11:25 am

how does a farmer find his sheep in long grass?

very satisfying










































































































:lol:

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Phlegmâ„¢
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Postby Phlegmâ„¢ » Sat Nov 03, 2007 11:07 pm

It's trash collection day. The trash collector asks the newly immigrated Japanese guy "Where's your bin?"
The Japanese guy replies, "I bin to work."
The trash collector asks again. "Where's your wheelie bin?"
The Japanese guy answers, "I wheelie bin upstairs having a wank."








There was a Chinese fella who would go every Sunday morning into a little coffe shop that was owned and operated by a Greek man, and every time he would order the same thing : "1 coffee, 1 flied egg." The mispronunciation always bothered the Greek man, who had worked very hard for many years to lose his foreign accent, etc. So one Sunday, when the Chinaman sat down and ordered his usual "1 coffee, 1 flied egg," the Greek had finally had enough. He told the man, "Look, it's f-f-R-ied egg, not fLied egg, and if you can't say it right, I don't want you eating here. As a matter of fact, don't come back here until you can say it right -- that's that!"

So a few years go by with no sign of the Chinese man. Until one Sunday, he did indeed return. He sat down, put his elbows on the counter, looked up at the Greek man and placed his order: "1 coffee, 1 f-r-ied egg, you Gleek plick
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http://smalltakeover.blogspot.com Updated with downloads from Trusty, Big Drill Car and Chemical People

RHB
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Postby RHB » Mon Nov 05, 2007 12:37 pm

How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb?
Two. One to change the lightbulb & one to suck your cock.

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niXon
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Postby niXon » Mon Nov 05, 2007 1:21 pm

TOHLG walks into a bar....
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punch-up
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Postby punch-up » Mon Nov 05, 2007 3:15 pm

How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb?
Two. One to change the lightbulb & one to suck your cock.



ahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Matt
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Postby Matt » Mon Nov 05, 2007 3:51 pm

That's off Freaked...love that movie...

>>>>>>&
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Postby >>>>>>& » Mon Nov 05, 2007 8:19 pm

Phlegm wrote:It's trash collection day. The trash collector asks the newly immigrated Japanese guy "Where's your bin?"
The Japanese guy replies, "I bin to work."
The trash collector asks again. "Where's your wheelie bin?"
The Japanese guy answers, "I wheelie bin upstairs having a wank."


wow who raped that old joke? jeezus

It's trash collection day. A man putting out his bin, asks his neighbour, a Maori man he hasnt seen for a while "Where's ya bin?"
The Maori guy replies, "I bin on holiday."
The neighbour asks again. "Nah, i mean, where's ya wheelie bin?"
The Maori guy answers, "Oh... well, I wheelie bin in jail, but my wife doesnt like me to tell people."
i am of the mind and the opinion that if something doesn't accept you,
you do everything in your power to fucking destroy it.
i don't care if it's the world, society, your family or a fucking high school
keg party.
you do everything you can to hit back...and strike back.
let go of some of that fucking hatred
i wanna poison this world the way it fuckin poisoned me.
i'm gonna to everthing, EVERYTHING in my power to corrupt, to twist, to
destroy, to rip apart, to poison.
i'm gonna spit my last breath in all your faces.
you're gonna hear me laughin at the end.

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dustbinflowers
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Postby dustbinflowers » Mon Nov 05, 2007 8:40 pm

and I remember exactly the same one with 'aboriginal guy'instead.

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Dead Kid
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Postby Dead Kid » Wed Nov 07, 2007 4:06 pm

"If you smacked a kid in the face with a bottle of Johnson's no more tears shampoo, wouldn't it create beautiful irony?"

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Dan Last
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Postby Dan Last » Sat Dec 29, 2007 11:26 am

I may or may not have made this joke, but it came to me all of a sudden last night. Prepare for the worst joke in history.

If you're camping you don't have to worry about running out of food, because you can always eat your...























BED ROLL.
I'm not a cool guy anymore.

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vibri
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Postby vibri » Sat Dec 29, 2007 3:03 pm

id eat a bed roll

they sound good

how would you cook them?

are they vegan?
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Dan Last
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Postby Dan Last » Sat Dec 29, 2007 3:44 pm

I think they're made from people.

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I'm not a cool guy anymore.

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vibri
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Postby vibri » Sun Dec 30, 2007 2:00 pm

hi
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MuscleMan
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Postby MuscleMan » Sun Dec 30, 2007 2:11 pm

Missionary Dan wrote:I may or may not have made this joke, but it came to me all of a sudden last night. Prepare for the worst joke in history.

If you're camping you don't have to worry about running out of food, because you can always eat your...























BED ROLL.


sweet jesus I hope someone told you that.

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ghetto ninja
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Postby ghetto ninja » Sun Dec 30, 2007 5:55 pm

I gave him an extremely disaproving glare after he told me that.
Martyrdamn wrote:Said 'hey baby gurl' to about seven girls tonight,
turns out girls don't like guys talking about getting up in their guts,
fagets, right.


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